So I recently had my first riding lesson, and was thrown into the idea of the horse "trotting." So if you're new to the idea, as I sort of was, it's the speed between the horse walking and the horse running. And this led me to an amusing little revelation.
It really hurts.
And those furry, little bastards enjoy doing it to you, I'm pretty sure. I swear the horse I was on was doing it on purpose.
See, what you're supposed to do to prevent this pain is to "post" which basically means "lift your butt out of the saddle in a rhythmic way so it doesn't get pounded into the saddle every two seconds".... which sounds way creepier than what I meant... Moving on!
Anyway this takes more leg strength that a nerd like me possesses, so by the time this half hour lesson stopped, I was pretty well beaten up and had the bruises to prove it. With no thanks to the horse, i might add. I'm positive it was changing it's speed up just to mess with me, knowing that I had no experience and only signed up for riding classes in the first place because I wanted to ride a horse while listening to the LOTR sound track on my iPod and pretend I'm a Nazgul.
That being said, now that my loins, groin, and buttocks have recovered from that ordeal, am I giving up this fruitless endeavor?
Heck no! I will chase down little hobbitsses yet! To the Shire!
God I'm a nerd.
Anyway, this has brought me to the revelation that it makes perfect sense why cowboys have those nice comfy saddles and why jockeys are tiny pre-pubescent boys who ride squatting above the saddle. A horribly horribly graphically clear revelation.
It really hurts.
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| I'm a cute leetle horsey! |
And those furry, little bastards enjoy doing it to you, I'm pretty sure. I swear the horse I was on was doing it on purpose.
See, what you're supposed to do to prevent this pain is to "post" which basically means "lift your butt out of the saddle in a rhythmic way so it doesn't get pounded into the saddle every two seconds".... which sounds way creepier than what I meant... Moving on!
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| Such a majestic beast... |
Anyway this takes more leg strength that a nerd like me possesses, so by the time this half hour lesson stopped, I was pretty well beaten up and had the bruises to prove it. With no thanks to the horse, i might add. I'm positive it was changing it's speed up just to mess with me, knowing that I had no experience and only signed up for riding classes in the first place because I wanted to ride a horse while listening to the LOTR sound track on my iPod and pretend I'm a Nazgul.
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| Don't judge me |
Heck no! I will chase down little hobbitsses yet! To the Shire!
God I'm a nerd.
Anyway, this has brought me to the revelation that it makes perfect sense why cowboys have those nice comfy saddles and why jockeys are tiny pre-pubescent boys who ride squatting above the saddle. A horribly horribly graphically clear revelation.
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| Only the Castrati are men enough to ride horses properly. | Click it I dare you. |
Absolutely, you cannot deny that if horseback riding ever happens, GET A NICE FLUFFY SADDLE
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